The shakes they come on suddenly after having a lack of rest or too much stress. I am not trying to be poetic or funny when I say this but I promised myself a long time ago I would not be defined shakes that could become seizures or one’s that are not a warning and last for 3-5 minutes long. I have had over 70 of these type of focal seizures over 29 years. Do I like talking about epilepsy and the answer is no. Do I like talking about acquired brain injury up until the last few years the answer would have been no. However I believe now more than ever I should my struggles and triumphs with both of my conditions.
You see I come from a long line of overcomers in my family and sharing my struggle I felt may weaken my resolve in attaining other goals in life. The disease of epilepsy and having an acquired brain injury were not going to stop me from attaining degrees, working or being an entrepreneur in my life. Even being a missionary for a time and teaching ESL.
The shakes remind me how valuable my medication is too my daily routine. That I do need my rest and can’t work at the same pace and I need a short nap every day to stay fresh. Yes I drink too much coffee too keep me alert but it has worked so far in regards to my education and work life. Drink water to clear out my kidney’s. Have a balanced diet and exercise is my life. These are just the facts.
My emotions with shakes or seizures is that it is terrifying each and every time. There I said it I am afraid that is my initial reaction to these medical interruptions that can effect the whole right side of my body for a day. My time of recovery can take the day but the strength back in my ride side can take weeks or months too what strength I had built up in the gym or other athletic activities. So this setback is maddening to me as my competitive nature hates losing.
My family and friends have all lightened the blow of my seizures over the years with limited success. I go through the range of emotions sad, mad, disappointed in myself and try not to get depressed. I tell myself to snap out of my moods after the first part of my recovery starts. I need to be positive and thankful to God that he has brought me out of another valley. Phillipians 4:13 say; “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” I am not one for pushing my faith on anyone. Just saying what helps get me through the tough times with my epileptic condition.
Had 2 wicked seizures hours apart when I had double pneumonia and cellultis while in the hospital this past May and daily I have regained strength in my body. The physical nature has always been the more difficult part of my recovery from a seizure. Emotionally and mentally I focus on the positives of surviving another one and getting better. I have been know to wrestle with God and seek answers to the why which he never answers. He does tell me I can use my testimony or journey to help encourage others and tell of what God has down for me.
These are not easy things for me to share. All I know I was blind but now I see like the blind man. Due to God’s amazing grace I am alive. Do I wish for a cure for epilepsy in my lifetime and the answer is yes for millions of others and myself. Until I am content with how God made me and that one day when I pass from this life into the next I will have a healed body when I reach Heaven.
So in conclusion may all of you who read this who have loved ones or you yourselves suffer from seizures my thoughts and prayers are with you. I promised myself to be an advocate for the brain injured and those with epilepsy and I will not be a victim thinking of just myself. So you can reach me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Facebook and Twitter at Tylor Stingel
if you need a friend. I am also available to share my story and give presentations to groups as well.
By Ty Stingel
October 7, 2013