PTSD

 What I am about to write probably my mom and dad only knew and experienced with me is childhood Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Why do I write about this after all these years. To let  others who have went through childhood or adult injuries. What also touches my heart. are the scares seen and unseen  from military combat that they are not alone in their struggle to be at peace with their past experiences, surgeries and near death experiences in some cases.

 Let me say first off I am no hero I am a brain injury and epilepsy survivor saved by God’s grace. My testimony or story has many layers but at the core starts with the Death and Resurrection of Lazarus in John 11:4  When he heard this, Jesus said, ” This sickness will not end in death. No it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” Jesus put his hand on Lazarus and he arose. The surgeons hand and many prayers pulled me through 6 brain surgeries in my first seven years all I wanted too be brave.

 I was grateful to be alive but I had a dream that seemed to repeat itself as my head was opened up and I was having an out of body experience not knowing whether I would live or die. While dreaming this my airway seemed to tighten up and I would wake up in a cold sweat. It was so hard to get back to sleep. When I was 12 years old I asked God to take that crippling nightmare away and it left me forever in my dream life. I am now 39 years old and it took many years to come to terms with my injuries from brain injury, bullying from school kids in elementary school. who I have long forgiven and asked forgiveness on my own anger issues to not let people get close to me at the time. I did not know the term P.T.S.D. at the time but I must have had it and God’s healing hand on my soul and mind was my cure.

 I can relate to someone who has went through childhood or adult illness of any kind and know we all come to a peace resolution in varying degrees. My heart hurts for those tormented from the different therapies that caused pain. May you find peace and happiness in your lives. May you know that you are not alone. You can be real with other survivors. Sometimes family and friends don’t understand your journey but we are not left alone if we reach out for help. You are worthy and valuable in this life we are given. Though it may not seem like it and the struggle may be great your lift is a gift. There is always someone who loves and cares for you.

 For the veterans who fought in the military may I first say thank you for your service. I am Canadian but have family members who fought on both sides of the Canadian- U.S.A. border in World War 1 and 2.  I will never know what you went through but my prayers go out to you. May you find peace through talking about your experience. You are valuable and you have worth back here at home and may you find peace, love and share your talents back at home. May I say welcome home and know that you have this civilian too talk to any time if you choose.

 Post Traumatic Stress Disorder does not have my soul and mind anymore. However all that read this that suffer from this have my prayers, support and respect. May you know that you have much too teach us from your experiences. You are all warriors and survivors. May you find peace and rest as you all deserve it. For all of you who don’t suffer from P.T.S.D. but know someone who suffers from this condition love on them, listen too them and may you be patient with them as they recover and are seeking help.

My hope and prayer their is not one more military personnel who commits suicide due too not receiving the proper help. May the stigma of mental health issues be taken away with education and understanding. By no means am I an expert but a person who wants too see those who served in the military or civilians get the help they deserve and live a life in peace.

By Ty Stingel

January 21, 2014

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